What makes a couple stable and what is not in most Russian families
You have met or heard such stories. Imagine a queue near the office of an official. About 20 people are sitting and everyone needs a single reference. And then the secretary comes out and reports that the official is no longer accepting today, and has just left. What you will see the unity of angry citizens, who had not before and did not care about each other!
Also in the family. Imagine: a couple, not the first year together, tired of family life. They tolerate each other, but on the whole they have not experienced much pleasure from communicating with each other for a long time – a lot of discontent, disagreement, and resentment have accumulated. But suddenly something happened. For example, a child fell ill, and not just with a runny nose, but with something requiring a long and difficult treatment. And parents unite in front of a common task – the child must be cured at all costs, and all disagreements, emotions (or lack thereof) go to the background. Continue reading
The rational and very useful achievement of the European family – the lack of division of responsibilities between women and men, may seem controversial for a Russian person, but it works with a high degree of efficiency.
For example, the decision of who exactly in the family should make money is made from the real possibilities of the family, that is, the one who knows how to do it better earns. And the gender issue does not arise here. If for the general benefit of the family the spouses agree that the wife should go to a good job after maternity leave, because she will earn more than her husband, he will safely take on the function of the father on maternity leave, and paid. This is provided by the state and justified by the rational law of life.
In this situation, the European family does not have the opinion that the husband is weak and dependent, and the wife is not a “draft horse” who “plows” to feed everyone. These are stereotypes rather of Russian society. Continue reading
“I love you, and I will repeat it again and again: I love you! And also – I know that you love me too. Hurrah! Therefore, I am happy! But there is one dark cloud in our sky: you are jealous of me. And you are wrong!
You want me to be always with you and give you all my attention: this is correct, I agree with this, I want the same. I also love spending time with you. But no one has yet canceled my business trips (haven’t we canceled yet?), And someday you will be bored without me. I have a hope that you will be bored without me, but I do not want you to worry or to spoil your mood from the fact that I am not around. When you smile and you are in a good mood, you are so beautiful!
But there is one more situation. This is a situation where you begin to suspect that I am meeting someone else during my absence. Moreover, I am not happy with the situation when you start looking for something that can confirm these suspicions. And the point here is not only that you spoil your health with negative emotions, the thing is that it is humiliating for me. Continue reading